have you ever seen a grown man cry?
since i've known him, he was a pillar of strength, despite all the tests God had given him - never once showing any sign of what goes on under that calm surface, nor shedding a single tear in front of me.
no matter how strong a man can be, faced with a situation with the possibility of losing his loved one, he succumbed to his emotions. his calm surface betrayed the emotions he had been keeping to himself, and his tears flowed freely. he was a mess paramount of a wreck which i have never seen before. yet, he managed a small smile for me. and all i could do was provide my presence as comfort.
the call came on Wednesday. after years of battling with failing kidneys, she succumbed to her illness. though she did not go easy, she went with a fighting spirit, holding on longer than expected. she was strong-willed to fulfil her last desire - to go home. It was only God's will that fulfilled her desire of being home, a home close to Him.
due to work commitments, i was unable to be by his side. I was torn between dumping my work and being by his side. I chose to stay at work. it was a bad choice. i couldnt concentrate, and offering prayers was my only solitude. I visited him on Thursday, and we had a long, tearful chat. I was touched by how she showered him with love, even though she was no longer around. even so, her presence was felt for he keeps her memories alive.
after all, she was the Queen of his heart.
In loving memory of Salnit Bte Sanim Aug 1954 to April 2007.Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat, Insya Allah.
+ she messed up at 8:59 PM
